A Bird in the Hand
My feathered
friend, Charlie, is a Lovebird. He loves
to sit and cuddle in my hand while I rub his head and neck. It is quite an experience to have a tiny bird
sit willingly in a human hand requesting love.
A human is an absolute GIANT to a small birdie, yet he sits and receives
without fear.
About 6
years ago when I moved to North Carolina, my partner Chris and I were in the
midst of extreme change. Houses were
moved, jobs were changed and just random chaos ran the show. Charlie w as being ignored. Of course he received food and water, but
daily birdie chats and head rubbies were a thing of the past. Charlie decided that plucking his own
feathers out was the answer to this dilemma.
It kept him occupied and he did get some attention, although negative,
from us.
Charlie didn’t
love himself enough at that period in time and imparted damage on his own
body. He felt as if his life was wasted
in a lonesome birdcage. We decided to
get him a Lovebird friend. As we
continued to run amuck in our lives, we didn’t notice that Charlie and the new
bird, Lorraine, were not compatible.
More feathers were plucked and Charlie was just plain mean. If you are familiar with birds, their beaks
can probably open a metal can with their strength and precise cutting edge.
After a few more
months of torture, we decided one day to let them outside to go free, to find
their way in nature and be happy. The
thought of a sad, caged bird was not an option for us anymore. They flew up into the trees and we said a
sad, but accepting good-bye. We could
hear Charlie screeching from afar, but knew he had the intelligence to find his
way. Charlie decided not to stay
outdoors. He came back that very night
and landed on Chris’s shoulder. It was
time to come home, back to familiar although not ideal surroundings. Lorraine also was retrieved but clearly she
didn’t want to come inside. Some time
went by and more Charlie feathers flew; there was no comfort for poor Charlie
with Lorraine.
One Summer
day, Lorraine decided to fly away to nature and we have yet to see her again. After her departure, Charlie started singing
again. He found happiness within himself.
I began to
ponder how Charlie’s challenges reminded me of my life. My past circumstanc es were torturous, I
didn’t want to be alone, but being with the “other” was worse. I didn’t love myself or feel worthy of
abundance, so I hurt my body in many ways and stayed a victim of others in my
life story. I was unhappy and I plucked
my feathers(so to speak) to show the world I was unworthy, so I could receive
some attention. I decided one day I had
enough and became best friends with aloneness.
Once I did, I felt fullness in my heart.
I could hear myself singing in the quiet moments, whispering words of
encouragement and hope. .
Charlie and
I decided to give ourselves the best gifts of all- loving-kindness and
nurturing. Our plumage speaks for
itself. Thank you, Charlie.
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